Janice Hardy ran a post on her Story Flip blog on those times when you want to show that time has passed as the protagonist learned a new skill or developed a new romantic relationship, etc. In film or on TV, sometimes you’ll see a video montage showing the character learning to play championship tennis, or becoming the karate kid, or going on a series of lighthearted dates with the new romantic lead. There’ll be invigoratingly peppy music accompanying it.
I usually end up rolling my eyes a little during the montage scenes. I think it’s lazy of the director…and, probably, I’m a little envious because literature doesn’t have a similar device.
So what can we do as writers, to indicate passing time and a major shift occurring in the character’s life? And how do we keep it interesting?
Janice’s idea was to introduce some conflict into the scene where this is occurring. This would prevent the scene from playing like some happy little sequence with only minor setbacks and a happy outcome after minimum effort. Maybe the hero has a setback while learning the new skill. Maybe the conflict of the novel is looming in the background, increasing the tension while this character is working hard to learn the skill…what can we have go wrong for the protagonist?
Her post got me thinking of other possible ways we could approach this type of scene.
Dialogue– The protagonist summing up what happened for another character: “You wouldn’t believe what I went through. I practiced from sunup to sundown every day for the last few months. Broke the strings on seven rackets. It was brutal, but I’m ready for the big match.”
A zippy summary—For the rest of the year, Tammy felt like she was barely hanging on as she worked two jobs, finished up the work for her degree, and kept as much of an eye on her daughter as she could.
Some showing, not telling on the work involved: “Ma’am? Did you decide which mat and frame you wanted for the diploma?”
“The nicest, most expensive thing you’ve got in the store.”
Or start your story at the point where the skill has already been learned or the relationship is already in progress. Or where the transformation is more important…and becomes a bigger part of the book. This isn’t going to work for those examples Janice gave where a character needs to suddenly develop these magical powers to rise to the occasion and defeat an evil force. But it could work in other areas.
Do you really need to start the story before Tammy suddenly decides to take on a couple of jobs and finish her degree while being a single mom? Could you start it with Tammy in the middle of this struggle? Or, conversely, should you have Tammy’s struggle be the plot of your book…not just a quick montage-type scene. Or you could have it start right as Tammy is coming out of the struggle. She’s had a rough last year, but she’s about to get her degree! Life looks great…she’s so optimistic. But then we can throw some major conflict her way right when she thinks things are looking up.
Have you ever had to write something you wish you could use a montage for? How did you approach it?
I’ve REALLY missed screenplay writing while working on my fantasy epic. A montage would make the learning-to-sword-fight and budding-romance scenes so much easier. I haven’t read Neill Gaiman’s “Stardust”, but the movie version had a great montage! (insert jealous grumble)
I use cut scenes and time jumps.
I’ll have a tension-filled scene where a character starts to learn something new, then I switch to another character for a bit, then when I come back to them, some time has passed and they’re better at the new skill. I’m about to employ a section break and do an age 10 to age 16 time jump, and I’m terrified. Wish me luck!
Elizabeth – Showing the passage of time (such as when a character learns a skill) can be trickly. Since I write murder mysteries, one of the things I struggle with is showing the passage of time as the police investigate. It doesn’t happen in just a few hours (or days, etc..), but readers don’t want a minute-by-minute account of it, either. I usually try to present what happens via dialogue. I’ll have one character tell another that a lab report came in, or I’ll have one character get an Email, fax or something with information. I think that’s better than giving every detail.
Interesting post.
I frequently wish I had the ability to write a montage, mostly because I enjoy them in films. Maybe it is lazy but the ability to pack that much information into such a few short minutes is great. I love the opening to Sahara because the film begins with the music and credits but while the music is playing the camera is panning around a room that is filled with pictures, news articles, awards and other paraphenalia that all add to our understanding of who the main characters are and what their history is so that by the time the movie starts it is like we’ve been on this massive journey with them and we’re already good friends with them.
As to what I do, I tend to do a really quick crush summary (the days passed in a blur with activity x and activity y filling every spare minute…). Usually I end up editing these out and finding ways to simply jump to the next scene. Maybe there is a better way to approach this.
Thanks for sharing this post.
I agree with you that montages in film seem a tad lazy (often, not always). And I too wish writing had a similar device. Zippy summaries can be good, ditto dialogue.
Perhaps also, time lapses can be shown by switching from 1st to 3rd person POV?
My manuscripts all have tight timeframes, so I haven’t encountered this yet. But it’s good to think about if I do.
When I started writing, the hardest words to type were “Three days later”… I felt obligated to be with the characters 24/7. I’ve probably used every technique you’ve mentioned.
Interesting and in depth look at an element of writing. I’ll sometimes use a scene break to flash back in time and “show” a scene in the character’s past that has a major influence in how he’she is reacting to what’s happening in the story now. That’s one way … really liked the others you mentioned, too.
Marvin D Wilson
Showing the passage of time can be tricky. Montages also work well with showing different characters at the same time as they deal with an event. You’ve got some great advice on how we writers can give our readers the same experience.
I’ve never had to write a montage but if I did, I would definitely look here for ideas. These are great!
CD
I haven’t had to make a leap yet, but I’m printing off your post for future reference.
I agree with you on movie montages – I consider most of them empty time fillers.
You gave some really great suggestions of how to handle it. I might show a bit of the struggle, then move forward into the future. But I agree, if you don’t need to show the entire struggle, then, if possible, start in the middle or at the end.
Helen
Straight From Hel
I love montages in movies, like when the character is training for something or preparing to storm a castle. They’re fun to watch!
I haven’t written anything that needed a montage, but these are excellent tips! Now I know what to do, thanks!
‘Maybe the hero has a setback while learning the new skill.’
But please, please, please can s/he not have a conflict with his/her elitist potions master (or analogue) who doesn’t think s/he’s worthy of the knowledge. For what must be obvious Pottery reasons I now see this all the time…
I haven’t yet written a montage, but I have had a long period of time pass within my novel. I used evolved character relationships and dialogue to hint at what occurred during the interval. I find it adds depth and makes a story more plausible when subtle interactions point to offstage maturation.
I think you definitely want to start the story when Tammy’s troubles are OVER… Like when she signs her publishing contract *cough*
I think it depends SO MUCH on the story. Think of Dumbledore’s Army learning all that stuff–that really WAS a literary montage, but it was possible because the groundwork had been laid when HARRY learned all that, so Jo could breeze over it. I think you can ‘summarize’ with things like what there WASN’T time for, because time was so filled with: [insert list here]
It really depends on what the reader needs to know about it though. I am reading a mystery that is frustrating me because every time the hero needs to know something, somebody comes out of left field and he happens to learn what he needs. So I LIKE the idea that maybe there are some struggles… times when the MC REALLY could have used something but didn’t have it, so applied himself to learning it. Gives all the little twists of tension build up and makes the ending when he’s mastered it that much sweeter.
My main character spends the first third of the book fine-tuning a skill that takes about six months. The scenes depict key moments in training – conflict with other characters, failure, discipline, etc.
I wish there could be montages too :) They would make life so much easier.
I tend to just skip and zip to the next important scene “Three days later, he …”
As always, a great post. Love your examples.
Martina
Lorel–That *would* be so much easier, wouldn’t it? A picture’s worth a thousand words…and a montage must be worth billions!
I think in YA that passing years are used pretty frequently, aren’t they? A section break and maybe some worked-in backstory (a little bit goes a long way, I know) might work out. Good luck!
Margot–Definitely! If it’s not a police procedural, I’m not going to want a lot of police investigation data. I love your idea of the fax that arrives with info, the important call, etc.
Cassandra–Haven’t seen Sahara but I can just picture that opening shot. I think film directors and screenwriters are SO lucky sometimes that they have these visuals to work with…and we have to create our own!
I think a short summation probably would work out pretty well there. You’re right…it’s one of those things that probably makes people wince during revisions.
Jill–I think a POV switch (which frequently starts with a new book section) might be a good way to show time has passed. I remember seeing that kind of technique in sagas.
The Old Silly–That’s a nice technique. So you would include some of the struggle to learn the technique, etc, in flashbacks or in bits of backstory. Good idea.
Clarissa–Thanks so much!
Jane–It’s usually when I go for popcorn. :)
Helen–I think sometimes it can probably be edited down if it’s not a very important scene.
Laura–Thanks!
Carol–And that IS nice. Mine do too. But I’ve always been an admirer of sagas…maybe one day I’ll give one a go and then I really will need to nail this stuff better.
Terry–I felt the same way. Now I’m like: “Okay, be off with you! See you this time on Saturday in the manuscript.”
Elspeth–That’s a great technique. I remember in the film class I took, it was an example of parallel editing? You know more about stage-type stuff than I do!
Café–Now that’s a very nice way of doing it. So we can tell that the characters relationships with each other have developed and gone through subtle changes.
Hart–
Yes! Tammys or Tamis definitely need to sign their contracts, for sure. :)
Great example–I thought Rowling did do an awesome job setting that up. And you’re right…it wasn’t skimped on, because we were already aware of what went into the process. It just didn’t have to be elaborated on.
Oh…the murderer who is one step ahead of the protagonist? Yeah, that can get frustrating. I think the reader has to be able to have some belief that they’re going to catch up and triumph at the end or else it’s rough going.
Alex–I think that sounds like a great way of handling it. You’re covering the training from all the angles.
hampshireflyer–We’ll make a proviso for that setback. :)
Adventures in Children’s Publishing–Thanks Martina!
Yes! I liked the starting in the middle… trying to find a way to show.
Jemi–I like zipping, too. :)
Kristen–Good luck with it! I think starting in the middle of the action is a great idea.