I think that mystery writers must have a very carefully suppressed criminal mind.
Apparently I look like a really innocuous person. Plus, maybe, a little foggy. I’ve ordinarily got my mind on other things as I’m wandering around.
I’m amazed at the number of times a stranger will get me to hold something for them or watch something for them while they hurry off to do something else. “Do you mind standing here with the car while I load it?” And their car is running while they run in the store to get whatever heavy item it is. And I think, “Wow. I could just drive right off with this car.” (I also wonder what the heck I’m supposed to do if a bad guy does come up to the car. It’s not like I’m armed or anything. I’d probably just let them take the thing.)
The number of open cash tills I’ve witnessed while clerks find managers to help them with a register problem is truly amazing. I could just reach in, grab wads of cash, and walk right out the store door.
My husband’s car hates me. His car alarm went off while I was driving. A policeman pulled me over, came to my window and then lazily said, “You certainly don’t look like a car thief to me. Do you know how to disable that alarm, ma’am? It’s distracting for other drivers. Do you have your manual with you?” I could have been driving a stolen car.
One set of denim-clad legs looks very much like another when you’re two years old. I was at Target some months ago, hurrying out the door, through the parking lot, clutching a bunch of shopping bags. I was loading up the trunk area of the mini van when I felt a set of arms go around my leg. I was horrified, as was the toddler who’d followed me out the Target, to my car. “We’ve got to find your Mommy!” I said, looking for whoever at the Target looked like she might be having a heart attack. All I needed for my Wednesday morning was to be locked away as a kidnapper.
As I swung around, there was a panicky mom just coming out of the Target. She saw me and relaxed, then hurried over. She said, “I’m so sorry! I guess she just thought you were me.”
I could have been a kidnapper. I could have been a really horrible person.
But I’m not. But I concoct really horrible people… easily. That’s because I can see the dark side of any situation and I’m always thinking ahead to the next mystery.
And now I’m thinking that I need to create a bad guy who looks and acts like me. :) She’ll completely escape detection.
I’m not sure how many other people go about their day thinking about possible criminal activities or motives for murder. I have a feeling that I’m in the minority among regular non-criminal citizens.
Do you find, as a writer, that you look at the world in a different way? How?
Oh, Elizabeth, I thought I was the only one! For some raeson, I often find myself in lots of those situations where I could wreak havoc if I were one of the people I write about : ). Once, for instance, I was outside a public restroom, and a complete stranger asked me to hold his baby while he used the men’s room. I *could* have been a vicious kidnapper. Fortunately, I’m not. Still!
I do think about the world differently because of what I write. Like you, I look at situations as possible settings for a new murder (“Gee, how high *would* that balcony have to be for a push off it to be fatal?”). I think it’s an occupational hazard.
As non-criminal types, we think murder and mayhem and the public sees us as innocent and helpful. What are the criminals thinking?
Okay I couldn’t help myself. I know it’s a strange question but another aspect of the criminal.
When writing – blogs, articles, etc, I also constantly look at the world around me for ideas.
Definitely a thought-provoking post! And Mason poses an interesting question as well, what ARE the criminals thinking? I guess they’re just taking it to the next level, whereas we just put pen to paper.
I can’t believe all the situations you’ve been in! That sounds like a novel right there! Maybe this is how your pro/antagonis turns to crime? Finally realizes they will never be suspected and takes a chance…”The cop didn’t suspect me of stealing the car, the mom didn’t suspect me of kidnapping…what could I REALLY get away with?” I think you have a great story on your hands. Something to really blow out.
Michele
SouthernCityMysteries
I agree with your blog. The murders I concoct in my mind are…well, criminal. I can’t write my murder scenes in the dark because I scare myself.
I often look at people and think the worst. That man must be a pedophile and that man is a thief. I think it all the time. My husband calls me critical. Maybe.
I would write about some of the others but I’m afraid the police will be at my door.
Great article. Glad I’m not the only one.
ann
Lately, everywhere I look and everyone I meet I wonder if I’m seeing a topic for my blog.
I also love to eavesdrop on conversations to pick up interesting phrases or even story ideas.
Lee
http://tossingitout.blogspot.com/
No wonder writing mysteries comes naturally to you! :) I have to say that librarians are often viewed as “safe” people too, when in fact, they are as varied as snowflakes. I do think writers have keen observation skills. I’m always asking the, “What If?” question to different scenarios. I think writers may appear safe because they save all the drama for their stories? At least, most writers I know do…
I don’t write murder mysteries…yet. I plan on trying it. Each story I do write always has a dark side, a mystery-but not necessarily a murder mystery. However, I too have OFTEN thought of the possibilities of crimes, or when I see two people arguing, I wonder what it could be about and then make something up. :0) I did it as a kid too, when i walked to school, I always noticed people in their cars. (I’m sure I looked quite odd, staring into passing cars) I would make up stories about them, what they were doing, where they were going and why. SOmetimes I would freak myself out and think of one of them as a kidnapper and God forbid they slowed down to turn near where I was walking. I would PANIC!! LOL
Great Post, I stumbled upon you through Southern Mysteries. :0)
This is so funny to me b/c I spent over an hour talking with a police officer yesterday conducting research and checking facts on my novel. By the end of the conversation he and his wife were laughing. They teased and he said, “You’re not planning on doing this, right?”
~ Wendy
Your post made me smile and wonder how much more frustrating it must be to be an innocent type who looks like a criminal. And, I guess just having that thought means that I do look at the world in a different way. I think writers, regardless of the genre, cannot stop those what if thoughts that pop into our heads uninvited.
In truth I’m a poet more than a novelist, and I see the world in color and sketch. I often paint in my mind when I’m in the real world. I love a portrait, a landscape, a sunrise.
When I’m viewing the world through my novelist eyes, I see manipulation and wry humor, and I see deeply into people’s motivation as they interact.
Not a bit like you’re murder-whipping, I reckon, but that’s the truth of things.
I have tried to write my antagonistic character in scenes and have repeatedly become blocked because I don’t want to wear his personality.
That’s a stumbling block on my part; as a writer I must be willing and able to become dark. We are, above all else, actors.
Great post as always.
Corra :)
“I need to create a bad guy who looks and acts like me. :) She’ll completely escape detection.”
LOL – perfect – GO with it!
The Old Silly
I love this post, Elizabeth! You are just so sweet, that no one could ever accuse you of anything!
I’ve often wondered if there’s a file on me somewhere; the things I look up on the internet can be very odd. I’m one for watching people’s movements and reactions. I also like wondering why certain people are with certain people. It’s a strange life.
Elspeth
I’m not a mystery writer, but I do look at the world differently I think, than most people. I think writers are more observant and curious than the average person. :)
You do have adventures, Elizabeth. I love the car hates me story. You probably didn’t like it all that much at the time, huh? You could easily adopt most of these in any of your books.
Best Regards, Galen.
Imagineering Fiction Blog
Even those of us who don’t write mystery (yet) think in strange ways, good lady–how easy would it be to deprive the gas station attendant of his wad of bills, what would happen if someone carted off an entire ATM machine on a hand-truck, what if that straitlaced woman in the business suit moonlighted as a drug runner, etc.
Something about writing certainly does warp the brain in very interesting ways. I wouldn’t have it any other way, though. But remind me never to ask you to watch my car for me while I run into a store… :)
DO IT!!! BTW, this is hysterical! I’m laughing in the office at work! Great stories!
I’m the person who always gets pulled over in the airport for the “random” inspection. How is it random if it happens every single time? Huh?
I think there’s a good possibility we might have been twins in another life. There’s a lot to be said for looking different from how you are. I know that I get away with a lot because I look like the kind of person who would never, ever try to get away with anything. And I certainly don’t look like I would write about murder and mayhem or delve into a psychotic’s mind. I see most everything differently than a non-writer would.
I am exactly the same type. Strangers seem to be willing to trust me with their lives. Well, I don´t think they are so stupid after all (trusting you or me, I mean, as we are probably rather harmless), but you are right, a murderer like you would escape notice for a very long time. Fiction is fun!
I should be a mystery writer, I see the same things as you.
I tend to look at everything differently. People, signs, etc.
Recently, after filling up at the gas station, it “asked” me if I wanted a receipt. The choices were yes and no thank you. I started to wonder why it wasn’t yes please . I mean, they had the thank you there…
Margot–Ha! Murder methods! My husband has told me that I’m probably on a watch list because of all the research I do. I order books online about poisons, research guns on the internet. I probably have an FBI file.
Ann–Our imaginations run away with us! I don’t think we’re pessimists..we’re just thinking about the best *story*. Because if everyone behaved, our stories would be pretty boring.
Lee–Oh yes! Eavesdropping. No conversation is safe around a writer. :)
Mason–Maybe they’re wondering how to deploy their plan? They may not be able to be as opportunistic as me–depending on how they look. Apparently I look like Miss Goody Two Shoes.
Michele–I think I’m always just the hapless bystander who gets roped into “helping.” You’re so right…I could really adapt it into something. How much temptation could one person take, anyway? What if…
Wendy–Classic! You probably have a file now.
Jane–Now THAT would be frustrating!
Maybe that’s what I should write…someone who is always fingered for a crime, but is always innocent. Until, one day…
Corra–Well-put!
We are like actors–we can try on different parts for a while. It can be hard to shake it off, though, you’re right!
Stacy–I can see that about librarians. :) Although I several librarian friends and I think they have a wicked side, too! They just don’t SEEM to.
Marvin–But then they’ll never be caught! :) It would be a problem for a mystery.
Kristi–Thanks for hopping over from Michele’s site!
I do that kind of thing, too. And I’m always wildly suspicious of everyone in parking lots. I hold my pocketbook like someone is planning on snatching it away from me.
Bethany–Definitely! And maybe…smarter. :)
Galen–It was very embarrassing at the time, since I don’t like drawing attention to myself. Darned car.
Simon–Fun to play the “what if” game, isn’t it?
I’d probably take your car. :) I’m getting bolder now that I’ve escaped detection for so long…
Carolyn–That’s definitely a writer’s quibble! I do that kind of stuff a lot. Walmart drives me nuts because the self-serve checkout line says “12 Items or Less” on the sign. It should be “12 Items or FEWER!” Crazy Walmart.
And THAT Elizabeth, is the difference between you and Voldemort. It is not your abilities, but your CHOICES! [/Dumbledore]
Me? I periodically get pegged as a mischief maker. Probably because I keep pretending to sneak off with stuff in the hopes that somebody will frisk me.
I do get asked to watch bags at airports from time to time… they can probably see that I’m not so wigged out by the rules that I will refuse… I generally only ACTUALLY break that rule though, for a frazzled mom… some emergencies call for some minor rule violation.
What a great post :)
There’s a lot of times I find myself laughing internally at situations or conversations or people. I know an echo of it will return later in a book.
Elizabeth, I’ll answer your question when I finally stop laughing at those stories!!!
You really are innocent looking, Elizabeth! That’s a hoot.
I can write really vicious bad guys and I don’t think people would suspect it of me. On the other hand, I’m not so innocent looking that strange kids follow me out of Target.
Loved this post.
Helen
Straight From Hel
Oh my goodness! I’ve had kids grab my hand by accident, but never follow me out of the store. I’m lucky people don’t know what is really going through my mind as I look to be innocently waiting for my kids to get out of school :)
oh yes. I am constantly fabulating horror stories. It makes walks with my dog hmmm…terrifying? I don’t know why I do it but I know it came before the crime writing. It is called ‘over-active imagination’ or ‘friggin’ hysterical’. It wears me out, it does.
People I have only just met often confide the most personal information with me, it’s the strangest thing. I don’t encourage them. They just spill the beans. As if I wear a sign on my forehead that reads, “Professional Listener.” I should be like Lucy from Peanuts, I should charge to listen. And you should charge to guard cars and cash registers. We could earn some mad money.
I’m pretty shy and reserved. The type of person everyone likes (that one baffles me). I even give out hugs at the end of my comments or to complete strangers. So when I read something I was writing to a friend of mine and he said, “You scare me.” I couldn’t help but smile. Perfect – at least for what I was writing.
For me it’s not a hard stretch to imagine horrifying. I had a pretty rough life and tap into that experience easily. I also know what it’s like to succeed and overcome such a life. Once again giving me a source to write from.
(Hugs)Indigo
Hart–Oh! I forgot that line. It all boils down to choices, not opportunities, doesn’t it?
Bags at the airport. I watched someone’s the last time I flew (and I’m a really newbie flyer.) I knew I wasn’t supposed to. Yes, I got fussed at.
Jody–That’s what they think!
Elspeth–Well, I guess if we ever DID anything and they took our computers, they’d see all the stuff we look up on murder. Probably wouldn’t work in our favor. :)
Diane–Aren’t they silly? I just shake my head. Good thing I’m not a criminal.
Helen–I’m a Goody Two Shoes…in appearance!
Kristen–It’s not random! They’re keeping an eye on you. :)
Carol–We must have been twins! Very innocuous-looking twins. :)
When I tell someone I write murder mysteries, you should see the look on their face. They don’t know whether to laugh or take me seriously…
Dorte–If they only knew what we were thinking! But, yes, I guess they were on-target with their trust. We certainly aren’t going to do anything but write about it.
Jan–We even scare ourselves! So true. I can freak myself out in any given situation.
Elizabeth–It’s so true! We could be a nice gang of thieves. The Elizabeth Gang! :)
Jemi–Or when you leave a group or party you write notes in your car about it? I’ve done that before. :)
Janel–If they only knew!!
Indigo–And isn’t it nice to try on a completely different role? If we can’t be scary in real life, then we certainly can in our books.
I’m the black sheep of my family (one of the few non-criminals on my mother’s side), and I ALWAYS think about those things–what’s the security like in this place? It’d be a lot easier to rob than a bank. I also get tasked to hold expensive cameras, watch people’s stuff, etc, because I look innocent. I am innocent and would NEVER actually run off with someone’s flash new digital camera after I photograph them–I can’t even speed on an empty street. These little thoughts must be my writer’s mind at work after all and not some latent genetic tendancy (whew!).
Lorel–If they’re not our writing brains and I AM a bad guy, then I don’t want to know. :)
Loved the post, Elizabeth, specially the story of the car that hates you. Now, if you put that into a real story, would anyone believe you?