The writing life is a tough one for many reasons…and it doesn’t help that friends and family don’t completely get what we’re doing.
But still, most of us get some support from the people around us. We might have a first reader among our friends and family.
We might have a spouse who gives us the time and space to stare out the window and write for a while.
And then, when our books come out, we have friends who are excited for us and rush out to buy our books.
Right?
Last week, I tweeted a post by mystery publisher Agatho (he’s anonymous) entitled For God’s Sake, Buy Your Friends’ Books. It was one of the most retweeted tweets that I made.
I got many direct messages from writers on Twitter saying that all of their family and friends expected them to provide them with a free copy.
This is, actually, pretty shocking to me. I usually have one person who might angle for a free copy, but everyone else I know is at the bookstore soon after release day—supporting me. My latest release was $6.99 at full retail…but even if it had been a lot more, they’d be trying to help me out.
Because we wrote a book. It took us many hours of relative isolation, writing and rewriting, and work to get that book in a bookstore.
As Agatho put it:
Please tell me why you choose to ignore this remarkable accomplishment by a family member or someone you call a “friend.” This person has labored, most likely for years, not only in writing a manuscript, but also in jumping through an endless series of hoops to get an agent and/or publisher. S/he has then had to exercise the utmost patience in rewriting several times to please an editor. Then, of course, comes the proofreading, which is even more work. At the end of the process, s/he holds an extremely affordable, compact, 300-page book that is the culmination of years of hard work and determination. And you – who will spend $4 for a cup of coffee at Starbucks, drop $100 for dinner for two at a trendy restaurant, or waste your money on cheap plastic crap at Walmart – cannot find it in your heart to buy a copy of this book?
Truthfully, though, some of the responsibility for this problem goes to the writer—who is giving these friends or family members free copies of the book.
I know it’s tough because writers can be reticent and don’t want to address the problem—it’s easier to just hand out the freebies.
But honestly, this is the best response (and it’s true…this is what we’re supposed to be doing with our author copies): “I’m sorry, but all of my author copies are spoken for. My publisher specifically requested that I send them to book bloggers and other reviewers to drive up sales. But I see that my book is available at ____________ for just $_____. I hope you’ll pick up a copy because I really think you’ll enjoy it.”
We can’t force them to buy our book…but we can educate them about the purpose of author copies.
Have you got good support on your book launch days?
Elizabeth – That’s one of the toughest things I face – getting $upport at book launch time. I don’t have much to offer or add to your post, because it is something I am trying to learn to do. I honestly don’t give away a lot of freebies (I think maybe I’ve given away four or five). But inviting everyone who knows me to click the “Add To Your Cart” button is a different matter. Thanks for talking about this, actually. It is nice to know I’m not the only one who deals with this…
I’m fortunate to have very loyal and supportive friends and family. More than 100 people came to my book launch party and we sold out of all the books Barnes & Noble brought! I hope they remember I have another book coming out in April (I think maybe I’ll remind them.)
As for the author copies, yes, they do go fast!
This is a very fine post which will probably help several of your readers who have already published books.
And I agree heartily; writers should try to send their review examples to papers and bloggers they think can sell some of their books. I do try to get my review books as cheap as possible, of course, and I buy many of them used, but I believe that I can also support my writing friends in that way as long as I review their books.
I get very little support other than “wow, that’s really great” from family. I’ve pretty much given up on expecting any book purchases from them. Most don’t ask for freebies; either they expect me to provide them or just aren’t interested in what I’m writing. I’m not brazen enough to ask! I did have to point out to my immediate family that my publishers don’t give author freebies, that I’m paying for them out of pocket.
Terry
Terry’s Place
Romance with a Twist–of Mystery
I’m one that likes to give away my books for free but you’re right, it should be common sense for our family and friends to support us by buying the books.
CD
Amen!
I do give away some of my free copies (and even a few I paid for). I’m not very good at pushing friends and relatives to buy. I’m afraid I’ve set an unfortunate precedent.
Since I support a lot of writer friends by buying books and/or requesting the library order a copy, I hope they respond in kind…
Excellent advice. I shall bludgeon my cheapskate friends and family with War and Peace until they stop bugging me for free stuff. :D
(Oh, and I’ll give them that “author copy” spiel, too.)
Wow, that is excellent! I didn’t have many asking for free copies, but I also didn’t have free ones to hand out, either. Your friend worded it so well though!
Good advice. I gave copies away to family members. But I also sent business cards to my family members to hand out to friends. The cards have an my blog address directing people to Amazon and B&N.
They’ve been handing them out so I think the freebie is a motivator for them to help spread the good word.
So true re: the Starbucks or dinner out! I make it a point to buy all my friends books, but it seems family and friends outside of writers circles just don’t ‘get’ it.
Getting the time to write is a challenge. This weekend I’m home alone, so I’ll share my time between some extra work in the office and writing on my so-called novel.
I make my money on geophysics, the writing is just a hobby. But I definitely see your point for anyone who try to make a living from writing. You can have my book for free when it’s completed, but I’m not gonna ask you for a free copy. I’m gonna order some books from Amazon later today; a book on mathematical geophysics, and Stephen King’s On Writing, and I’ll add Pretty is as Pretty Dies to my cart too >:)
Cold As Heaven
This is a fantastic post! I couldn’t agree more. We have to support our friends and buy their books. I never ask for ARC’s because I always buy at least one copy. As a writer I know ARC’s are best served in the hands of book buyers and bloggers! Thank you for this post.
THank you for posting this, particularly the little sample script at the end. I’m afraid that I might end up in the situation where I’m being asked about free books, now I’ve got a reason not to. I hadn’t even thought of using author copies for bloggers. I really did think they were for my mom. Thanks again!
When my first book came out, I was amazed at the number of “friends” who didn’t even want to read a free copy, much less pay for one. Their assumption was–“if it was written by somebody I know, it must not be worth reading.”
I’ve since found new friends, but I find some family members still expect freebies, even though I have to pay for shipping myself, because they think writers are rich. People have so many misconceptions about the writing life.
Clarissa–I think that, honestly, they just don’t connect the dots sometimes when it comes to buying our books.
Margot–I was really amazed at the response on Twitter to it…it showed me what a problem it is.
Simon–And not the abridged version, either!
Alan–That’s an incredible number of people at a book launch! Great support. Yes, they need to do the same in April. :)
Alex—I thought he did a nice job summing it all up. :)
Stephen–I think that sometimes family can act as our best promoters! It all depends on who is in our support group.
Dorte–Reviewers are in a totally different category! They help in a variety of ways…particularly since their reviews will live on online whenever potential readers search out reviews.
Laura–Books really aren’t very expensive (as long as they aren’t textbooks or professional manuals or that kind of thing.)
Cold As Heaven–Oh, it’s nice to have my online friends to support me, too! I think we’re all a really supportive community anyway, and show that in different ways…sharing info and encouraging each other, etc. My beef is really with the in-person friends who’ve seen us slaving over these books. They should definitely shell out a couple of bucks for us. But thank you so much! :)
Terry–That’s another good point–a lot of smaller and independent publishers don’t even provide many–or any–author copies.
Heather–Fortunately, none of these non-writing folks usually even *know* about ARCs! If they did, they might say, “But I thought you had ARCs for reviewers?” Of course, we’re supposed to send out *both* ARCs and author copies to reviewers or for reader contests on blogs, etc. The more promo, the better.
Jessica–And sometimes I can even manage to look really regretful that my mean publisher has requested that all my author copies go to book bloggers. :) I’ve got the little speech downpat, now.
Anne–As if someone that *they* knew wasn’t clever enough to write a publishable book!
Oh, the rich writer myth! It’s hard to believe that one is still out there, but I run into it pretty often, myself. I think that’s because of Patterson, King, and Rowling and a couple of others. :)
Patricia–The precedent is the problem, isn’t it? Of course, I guess you could always tell them that the economy forced the publisher to cut back on author/review copies?
Definitely! I’ve made the request at my library a couple of times, Patricia. Right now it seems they’re slow to order because of budget cutbacks, but I hope their situation will improve soon!
Hi ELizabeth .. methinks they don’t understand us bloggers (as I am) & you .. (til I am!) as authors .. the non-belief and non-acceptance of enjoyment we get on being published .. be it here as a comment, or in reply to a comment on my blog .. and exactly as you say – the blood, sweat and tears .. as you/me strive for our publications in whatever mode.
Good for you – & absolutely right .. have a great Sunday .. Hilary
Wonderful post, Elizabeth. What you wrote is so true. Family and friends should support the writers they know and are related to, but it’s difficult not to give copies to relatives. I’m very glad you addressed this.
Hilary–I think, honestly, it’s completely innocent on the part of many family members or friends–just sort of a big gaffe that they don’t realize they’re making. :)
Helen–I was surprised it was as big a problem as it is…writers get so little support that it’s nice to at least get it from those who are close to us.
Hi Elizabeth .. I’m sure you’re right normally! I just know that one member of my family is amazed that I’m doing so well with the blog .. and yet the rest couldn’t be bothered to look, to attempt to understand .. and thus will not see any benefit now as in support, or future from potential. Very sad – it’s taught me to have an open mind – when I look at people’s work!
Our day will come! Enjoy today – Hilary
What a fantastic post. A friend recently self-published her book, and since she felt I had helped her in the writing of the book, she wanted to mail me a copy. I refused on principle – she’s written a book which I can afford to buy, why should I not buy it. Her point was that she wanted to express her gratitude, so I told her to buy me some other book to do that, but insisted I would only read her book if she let me buy it.
Honestly, how difficult is it to buy a book and support someone who had put in so much effort into writign it?