People sometimes think of writers as being sensitive types.
I have to snort when I hear that. Writers can’t be sensitive types. Oh, I think that we’re naturally pretty emotional people.
But to make it in the publishing world and not completely have a breakdown, we have to develop a really, really tough skin. And lose a lot of the sensitivity.
Criticism starts early in the process: from us. We’re sometimes our own worst enemies—comparing our writing negatively to others or telling ourselves that we don’t know what we’re doing.
Then comes our first readers or critique groups. This is where we first hear that the manuscript we’ve slaved over has some problems.
Then come agents or editors or both—either we’re getting rejections from them or we’re getting editorial change requests (something wasn’t right.)
Then comes reviewers—both print and online. And readers.
All the criticism or rejection can feel pretty overwhelming, if we let it.
What I try to tell myself is that everyone is entitled to their opinion. There are plenty of great books out there that I’ve heard friends rave about that I actually didn’t enjoy—and it wasn’t the book, it was me. Maybe I wasn’t in the mood to read something serious/silly/thoughtful. Or maybe the narrative voice just didn’t resonate with me.
This past week, an article from The Morning News got a lot of buzz. The article listed some of Time Magazine’s picks for the 100 best novels from 1923 to the present day—and gave their 1-star Amazon reviews.
Here are a couple of excerpts to show that if you’re getting reader criticism (from crit groups, agents, editors, or readers), you’re not alone:
The Grapes of Wrath (1939)
Author: John Steinbeck
“While the story did have a great moral to go along with it, it was about dirt! Dirt and migrating. Dirt and migrating and more dirt.”
The Lord of the Rings (1954)
Author: J.R.R. Tolkien
“The book is not readable because of the overuse of adverbs.”
Mrs. Dalloway (1925)
Author: Virginia Woolf
“The only good thing to say about this “literary” drivel is that the person responsible, Virginia Woolf, has been dead for quite some time now. Let us pray to God she stays that way.”
The Sun Also Rises (1926)
Author: Ernest Hemingway
“Here’s the first half of the book: ‘We had dinner and a few drinks. We went to a cafe and talked and had some drinks. We ate dinner and had a few drinks. Dinner. Drinks. More dinner. More drinks. We took a cab here (or there) in Paris and had some drinks, and maybe we danced and flirted and talked s*** about somebody. More dinner. More drinks. I love you, I hate you, maybe you should come up to my room, no you can’t’… I flipped through the second half of the book a day or two later and saw the words ‘dinner’ and ‘drinks’ on nearly every page and figured it wasn’t worth the risk.”
How do you handle criticism? Any tips to share?
Hope you’ll join me later today/tomorrow when I guest post on Margot Kinberg’s great blog, Confessions of a Mystery Novelist.
When to listen and when to be polite? A healthy dose of self-knowledge that we don’t have all the answers and a gut for what’s right.
All I can say is AMEN to the thick skin and LOL to the critical quotes!
Elizabeth – You are so right about having to have a thick skin. There’s an old saying that “everyone’s a critic,” and it’s true, I think. And as your examples show, criticism doesn’t mean everything : ). I would say you need to have a strong belief that what you are writing is worth reading. And it’s important to have people in your life who also really believe in you. I know I depend on my family, for instance, and my wonderful beta-readers, because they believe in my writing.
Grapes is my all time favorite book and it IS about dirt. :)
Umm criticism. It a push–pull relationship. I want to hear the criticism hoping it will help me be a better writer and a better story. Then I want to push it away, because it’s too painful. It’s growth.
Teresa
Thick skin is BIG – so is the ability to really listen to a critique :)
Whenever I hear criticism, I put my hands over my ears and shout “Na Na Na Na Na.”
Yes, having a very thick skin helps.
The words always sting. But the sting fades and then we have to think about the comment. Is it valid? Is it one out of ten or do others say the same thing? Definitely thick skin.
Things I’ve learned (although not necessarily dealt with well):
1) you have to separate criticism of the work from criticism of YOU.
2) it’s always ONE opinion.
#2 is easier to deal with as you move through the business, because you’ll be getting rejections that cite totally different reasons; or you’re entering contests where the judges are at opposite ends of the spectrum in their scoring.
But it’s never going to be easy.
Oh my God, this made my day. Thank you, Elizabeth, and thanks, too, for your kind comments on my blog today.
karen
You just made my day! The next time a critic says to me:
“The book is not readable because of the overuse of adverbs.”
I will be very proud indeed of being in such marvelous company! :D
I think, as Terry commented, you have to understand that criticism of your writing is not criticism of you. It’s a hard lesson to learn.
I try to comfort myself with the thought that everyone is entitled to their opinion, no matter how wrong it is!
Wow, those are the funniest reviews. Probably not funny at the time to the authors, but funny now as we look back at these books. It’s said that actors have the thickest skin because they are constantly being rejected, but I think writers are right up there with them.
I’ve had so much criticism that the worst now comes only from me. If I don’t like it, I change it. I don’t necessarily always accept all criticism by others. I listen, graciously, but don’t always act. Wonderful post, Elizabeth.
CD
So correct … as a writer one cannot be afraid of rejection. on the flip side, we writers sure dolove praise though when people talk about or books LOL!
I smile and thank them for their criticism. Tell them I learned something practical. But rejection does hurt, if only a little bit. The Bible says there is a season for everything and mourning and feeling pain is one of them. Sometimes its something in life we simply gave to manage the best we can.
Stephen Tremp
I think on Goodreads I gave Grapes of Wrath a 2-star rating. I didn’t hate the book; I was just utterly bored by it when I had to read it in school. Lord of the Rings is hard to read sometimes but not because of the adverbs; it’s the long passages of poetry and the language itself. (I love it anyway.) There are plenty of modern books my friends enjoy that I don’t, and ones I enjoy that my husband, despite similar tastes, does not. I just keep all of that in mind now when I share my work for critique and when giving critiques. I’ll usually preface a crit with, “this type of story is not to my taste” so they know the context of my opinion, then try to keep my comments to technique rather than style.
Those reviews are so funny and encouraging. I handle criticism pretty much the same way you do – by telling myself I can’t please everyone and that I did the best job I could.
Robert–Well put!
Toby–I thought they were funny, too.
Margot–Having a good support group definitely helps when criticism happens.
Journaling Woman –All about dirt! :) That one made me laugh…guess they didn’t realize it was about the Dust Bowl!
Jemi–Very true..if we just reject the criticism outright then we’re missing out on anything constructive that might be there.
Alan–Me too! :) Yeah, the thick skin takes some time.
Helen–True! I think writers get more rejections than actors–but the rejections are different, I guess–actors frequently experience face-to-face rejection/criticism in auditions or from an audience they’re acting in front of.
Carol–I can usually find something in the criticism that I can consider changing for the next book.
Terry–Good point. The writing is just one aspect of who we are and they’re not criticizing *us*.
Clarissa–Oh, we’re definitely our own worst enemy, aren’t we? :)
Stephen–It does hurt..we put a lot of time into our books. But usually there’s SOMEthing we can glean from their criticism that might help in a future book.
Jaleh–And then readers who have similar tastes can be helped by your review–makes sense.
Karen–You’re so welcome! :) They made me smile, too.
Dorte–*Very* good company!
Jane–Exactly. But *wouldn’t* it be nice if we could please everyone? Ahh. I can’t think of any writers who have done that, though.
Elspeth–Ha! And wrong it is. ;)
One of the things I really enjoyed about this post was how snarky those early reviewers were. They certainly didn’t hold back, did they.
And you are so right about how thick our skin needs to be.
*snicker*
It’s so true–there are people who devour romances and I just rarely can deal with them.
I can’t say I disagree with a couple of those reviews though. Not a fan of Hemingway or Woolf.
Ha! “…the overuse of adverbs.” *snort*
Also, I happen to find stories about dinner and drinking and talking sh*t about people fascinating. It helps if some people die between all the drinking, eating, and smack-talking, but sometimes you can’t have everything.
I wonder how Hemingway would have done urban fantasy….
Hart–And unless we’ve written a cross-over book, there’s really no way to please those folks!
Simon–The Hemingway one really cracked me up because *yes* it IS like that, but there’s just so much more there…
Mmm. Hemingway and urban fantasy? Let’s see. It would be set at a futuristic bar… :)
Maryann–No, there was no holding back! Snark won out in a big way. :)