So I was in the grocery store….again….(must make more lists) and was nearly run down by a little guy pushing a shopping buggy that was bigger than he was.
“Benjamin! Watch our for the mommy!” fussed his mother before apologizing to me.
She kept on scolding, “Honey, you can’t just go running through the store with the cart! You could have hurt this mommy.”
I was—quickly—walking away by this point, but I was struck by the fact that the woman had pegged me, twice, as a mother.
As far as I’d known, I hadn’t put on a “Hello, My Name is Mommy” nametag before leaving the house.
I didn’t have a child with me.
But—I was at the grocery store in the middle of the morning on a work day. I didn’t look at all professional—I wore my usual uniform of a cotton v-neck tee shirt, shorts, and flip flops. And I’m sure I looked distracted— par for the course for most moms. I hadn’t slept well (which is completely normal for me) so there were circles under my eyes. I had “Mini-Moos” green and yellow yogurts in my cart and “Goldfish”-type crackers.
The clues were all there, despite the lack of children.
That’s what I’m aiming for with my character descriptions. I want the clues to be there. I want the reader to pick up on the hints and feel clever about their deductions.
Some things have to be told, but it’s a lot more fun planting clues about our characters for the readers to discover.
Next time I’m at the store, I’m wearing a dress, though.
If you show with good details, it doesn’t matter whether you tell or not. The details are the fun part.
I’m getting wrapped up in character development right now, and having fun gathering these little (and big) clues.
(What I’m trying to do is world building for a fantasy novel, but I’m getting at it through the characters instead.)
Another lovely post. I find it incredible how you always relate a writing lesson to something (amusing) from real life.
And please do not get more organised- if you make fewer trips to the grocery store, where will you get your stories from?
~ Rayna
Well; wearing a dress seems a normal thing for stay at home moms. It may not be a fancy dress, but is usually something casual and comfortable, yet flattering.
And manicured nails; Moms have beautiful nails filled nails, polished and decorated with distinctive personality styles.
Not me, of course. This is just what I’ve observed through the course of my day job.
And yes; I use that in creating believable characters. Some world building has to take place, but characters are what drive a story for me.
……….dhole
Elizabeth – Dropping clues really is an effective way to let the reader get to know our characters. Sometimes it’s in the way they dress, or move, or what they say, but those hints are a lot more intriguing, I think, than outright telling the reader. To me, it’s a matter of “show, not tell.” Really important point to remember – thanks : ).
Oh, this is so helpful, elizabeth, to a beginning fiction writer like me. Thanks.
Karen
The Daring Novelist–I think it’s more fun for us, too, isn’t it? I like the idea of world-building through the characters. Reading a fantasy with lots of description would definitely get old after a while! I think you’ve got the right take on it.
Rayna–This is true! The fact that I go to the store nearly every day (oops…no butter. Oops…forgot the drinks for the kids’ lunches. Oops..) means that I’m out of the house long enough to actually experience real life! :)
Donna–I’ve SEEN these moms you speak of! They scare me a little since I have the strong suspicion that they also have a nanny while they stay at home. Or…maybe I’d just like to think so. My nails are–well, I just need to get a manicure before I go to that conference at the end of the month. :)
Characters really make the story for me, too.
What a great post! I also enjoy the way you’ve taken an everyday event and turned it into a writing – and life – lesson. I’ve often read that in writing a great story, the telling or character development is often more in what one does not say rather than what one says. One last little tidbit of very decriptive, or “telling” clue you put in your post is the use of the word “buggy.” that tells me you are either from the South, Currently living in the South, or have done some good research on the mannerisms and speach of the Southerner. I’m new to following your blog and have already found many good things here. Keep it up.
What a good example of how we see people. A mummy indeed :D
I think one of the things I love about my job as a teacher is that for the first time in my life I am just myself – not my father´s daughter, my husband (the vicar)´s wife or my children´s mother.
JL–You *are* a good detective! Yes, I’ve lived in the South my whole life. I did put a “cart” in there, too, just to be on the safe side because “buggy” was edited out of “Pretty is as Pretty Dies” as being too colloquial. But it’s what comes naturally. :) Thanks for coming by the blog.
This is a *great* anecdote. It’s the details in fiction that makes it come to life. We could write a character that we explicitly describe as a mother, but the effect won’t be nearly as vivid as if we built up the case for motherhood via the circles under the eyes and cart full of yogurt.
Subtle clues – I like that.
Damn, now I wonder what people think of me when I’m at the store…?
LOL! They might see me in the middle of the day as well, but not a chance I’d be pegged for a mommy.
I’ve gotten that a few times too. There must be a ‘mommy’ air about us. :)
I enjoy planting clues as well – good description.
You make an excellent point, and what a fun story. Thanks for sharing!
Keep going to the grocery store because the trips are practically writing your blog posts for you!
Great points- thanks for the reminder to add subtle clues!
I love it in a novel when the author drops hints as to what a person is or does without just spelling it all out in a data dump.
LOL, you reminded me of 1983. I had to represent our business at a council meeting. Suited and booted, with briefcase in hand, I felt the part. When I returned home, DH asked if I had worn the nappy (diaper) pin on my lapel all evening. The little things give big clues to those who look for them.
Interesting post.
Margot–The dress and movements are great pointers, aren’t they? Are they always in a hurry? Sluggish? Clumsy?
Alex–I think it’s better that we DON’T know. :)
Diane–They wouldn’t *dream* of it! You’re too pulled together to look like a mommy. :) It’s a good thing!
Karen–Hope it helps. :) And have a great weekend.
Shelley–Thanks for coming by today!
Dorte–That would be NICE. I’m always someone else. I think even when I’m at an appearance, I’ve still got my mommy hat on (somewhat askew, of course…)
Laura–Thanks so much! :) And don’t worry…I go to the store daily. Sigh!
K.M. Weiland–Thanks so much for coming by! And I agree–it’s a fun way to add a little interest to character depiction.
Marvin–I’m like you–I skim over the data dumps. Too much description doesn’t interest me.
Glynis–Oh, that is TOO funny! Isn’t that just always the way? Feel good about yourself only to find out you’ve been wearing a diaper pin. :) I been everyone was charmed, though…that’s cute.
That’s just perfect! I’m sorry you were mommy-stereotyped, but it’s so true that those little details really make a character!
Ha! That’s great. How funny that it was so obvious. I wonder sometimes what people see in me when I don’t have my kiddos. I have had a couple of different kids accidentally wrap their arms around my leg mistaking me for their moms, though. So maybe that says something.
Planting clues are fun for an author. I like planting a clue where someone knows not to do something, but they do it anyway. In the course of an action a clue is planted that will ultimately lead to major turn in the plot.
Stephen Tremp
You’re always teaching us, even in your everyday activities. You sure you’re a mom and not a teacher (or both)?
Helen
Straight From Hel
Jemi–I guess we should see it as a compliment! Not! :)
Stephen–Cool…like a Pandora’s Box idea? That would be fun to work with.
writingyourfeelings–They do, don’t they? I’m pretty used to my mommy typecasting. Sigh! I probably should think about how I look before I go out in public.
Carolina–Oh, that’s happened to me, too! And then the little ones are so appalled when they look up and it’s the wrong set of legs. :)
Helen–Well, my dad is a teacher. :) So maybe it comes naturally. Thanks.
This is a good suggestion for all writers in all genres.
It makes me remember Sherlock Holmes and his deductions about characters.
June
June–Thanks! :) And thanks for coming by.
Laughter helps the lesson stick.
These details make a character memorable.
I so enjoy your posts.
Maribeth
Giggles and Guns
Maribeth–Thanks so much for coming by! :)
I think it was the Mini-Moos that gave you away. I’m not a mommy of small people, and you still might see Goldfish in my hair.
Okay, not Goldfish. I’m more likely to have Starbucks latte dribbled down my shirt front. :)
That was so interesting.