Creating Unlikeable Characters

card

My daughter was a little bored yesterday afternoon, so I offered to play a game with her. I didn’t want to play a long game with her (like Monopoly), and it happened that there was a deck of Old Maid cards very handy.

She did not want to play that game.

When I finally persuaded her to play, she shrieked whenever she got the card and did everything in her power to give it back to me. She was a wreck.

Luck was on her side and she won 2 out of 3 games. The one she lost really upset her. And she doesn’t even know what an old maid is. She just didn’t want the card with the leering, goofily-unattractive woman on it. She seemed to associate some really sinister feeling to the card.

I need characters like this sometimes. I need characters that no one wants to be around, that throw monkey wrenches into my plot.

I’m not talking about flawed characters. Flawed characters are interesting and fun, well-rounded, and sympathetic to readers. I’m talking about characters that other characters run away from, screaming.

You know them—the Uriah Heeps of the world.

Ways to Conjure Up the Ick Feeling for the Reader

Other characters’ negative perceptions of the character. Do they cross to the other side of the street when they see them? Does a chill go up and down their spine when someone mentions their name?

Invade the reader’s personal space. Have the character stand too close to the protagonist in conversations. Bestow them with unpleasant smiles full of bad teeth and malodorous breath.

Grate on the reader’s nerves. Conjure up that fingernail on the chalkboard feeling with a whiny, discontented voice or the habit of arriving at houses uninvited and staying far too long.

It’s not too hard to do—we’re basically going to imbue the character with annoying habits, poor table manners, and anything else that personally bothers us. We just have to be careful not to overdo it—make it a character that goes onstage only for short periods of time or after long intervals offstage.

Have you delved into the world of unlikeable secondary characters?

Classes

Rembrandt van Rijn-- Rembrandt’s Mother Reading-- 1629 As I mentioned on Thursday, you don’t have to spend a lot of money to become a better writer. You can use your library card and get more information than you can ever find time to absorb.

Sometimes, though, we need a little extra help. When I was writing my first book, I was definitely aware of areas where I had shortcomings. I wanted more information on “show, don’t tell.” I wanted to know how to write a well-crafted synopsis. I wanted to learn more about creating well-rounded characters.

So, I took online classes. And they worked out really well.

Like anything, it depends on the instructor. But the classes I took were taught by working writers. And I only sought out classes that were in the $20-$50 range. Some of them, like the Blog Book Tour class, were free.

In my experience with online classes, they work like this:

*You go to the website find the class you’re interested in. Usually you pay via PayPal or credit card.

*You then will be joined to a Yahoo group, which goes active on the first day of the class.

*The classes that I took usually lasted four weeks, with two lessons posted each week.

*Everyone in the class introduces themselves on the email loop. The instructor introduces himself/herself, gives his/her qualifications, and then provides the syllabus.

*The instructor gives a first lesson, usually in some detail, and with examples of vivid characterization, or plotting, or whatever the class is covering.

*The lesson ends with an exercise for the class members to do individually, then post back to the email loop. The instructor gives feedback on each individual person’s assignment and answers any questions. Usually you have a certain number of days to post on an assignment before you’re expected to move to the next posted lesson and assignment.

There are classes online that run into the hundreds of dollars. I really just can’t recommend those. I think you can get much the same experience, on a wide variety of topics, at a much lower rate.

Here are some links to online organizations and sites that sponsor online classes and their calendar of upcoming workshops. The classes range from $15 to $50.

http://www.writeruniv.com/

http://www.writersonlineclasses.com/?page_id=22

http://www.rwanational.org/cs/chapter_conferences_and_events#online

http://www.rwamysterysuspense.org/index.php

http://www.romance-ffp.com/workshops.cfm

Have you taken any online classes? What did you like or dislike about them?

Talented Characters

Summer Session at Ballast Point 1930--Charles Reiffel-1862-1942 Yesterday I stretched myself a little.

The stretching exercise involved the garbage disposal, which spitefully kicked the bucket on New Year’s Day, following a visit by my husband’s family.

I grabbed the phone number of the appliance repairman to throw myself on his mercy.

My husband, on the other hand, was intrigued. What was wrong with the garbage disposal? “Look–there’s something lodged in there,” he said. “Can you get me some pliers?”

I gave him a dubious look. Were pliers the pinchy things?

After my husband decided to locate the pliers from the garage pegboard himself, he attacked the disposal with enthusiasm. There was a penny lodged in there. How or why the penny had gotten there, I couldn’t say.

“There’s a hole at the bottom of the disposal…under the sink, “ my husband told me. “If you put an Allen wrench in there and turn it, you’ll get the penny to this spot where I can get it out.”

So there I was, sitting on the kitchen floor, turning an Allen wrench into the disposal. Fixing things, solving problems? I’m not good at that. That’s one reason my husband was so fascinating to me when I met him in college. Oh! He knows how things work by just looking at them.

Novels are usually about interesting people. And interesting people have skills, talents, and hobbies. In the mystery genre, there are many talented sleuths. They’re not only talented at sleuthing, either. Depending on the book, they might be crocheting, knitting, scrapbooking, or doing crosswords. Having a hobby is a big deal these days in mysteries.

I write the Memphis Barbeque series for Berkley Prime Crime. I’m not Bobby Flay. But my Lulu is.

The thing is…we can’t afford to write characters that are limited to our own abilities. I need characters who are chefs, expert gardeners, and mathematicians. I need athletes, chess players, and painters. If I only write what I know, then my books are going to get stale.

Sometimes? It means research. I cringe when I type research because I’m on such a limited schedule. But if it means lending authenticity and depth to a character, I’m going to do it.

Why creating a talented character is good for our book:

* The character introduces something new, different, and interesting to readers. Dan Brown created a professor that taught Religious Symbology at Harvard. There isn’t any such course of study. In fact, MS Word underlines “symbology” in an angry red color to tell me the word is made-up. But Brown made it real and interesting to readers with his research into symbols and religious history. He mixed fact and fiction with successful results.

*The character is a rounded person with an occupation, hobby, curiosity, or interest. They have a life, they have talents—they’re thinking, breathing people. And, honestly, if they’re not like us, we have to work harder at making them live. And hard work, with characterization, isn’t such a bad thing.

*We get to learn, too. I know a lot more about owning restaurants and cooking after spending time working on my Memphis book. And Myrtle, with her helpful hints column, has had me busily searching through the old wives’ tales and home remedies.

With work and creativity, we can stretch our boundaries and those of our characters. Then they get to use their own, specific talents to grow and solve problems.

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I also wanted to thank Mason Canyon , who was sweet enough to give me the Honest Scrap award. She asked her recipients to mention ten things about themselves.

I wish I were more interesting. :)

1. I break a vacuum cleaner every single year. I got my newest one, a Hoover Windtunnel, 2 days ago.
2. I backpacked around France and Italy in college.
3. I don’t sleep much.
4. I have a hard time sitting still. I leap up and pace around when I write.
5. I took 5 years of French and 2 years of Latin.
6. I have a political science minor.
7. I’m incredibly clumsy. I fall down the stairs at my house on a regular basis and have trouble walking through doorways without hitting my shoulder on the doorjamb.
8. At parties where I don’t know anyone, I gravitate toward quiet, nerdy types.
9. I’m at least the 5th Elizabeth in a row in my family tree. I was always called “Little E” to distinguish me from the other Elizabeths, since I was youngest. But I wasn’t little—I was always tall.
10. Being the low girl on the totem pole at the 2 periodicals I worked for taught me to be able to write on anything. At a moment’s notice.

If you haven’t had a chance, pop over and see Mason’s blog. Her blog is well-organized and thoughtful—a huge accomplishment for such a new arrival in Blogdom.

July 8th Resolutions

I decided to make resolutions for myself in July. I needed to set some goals and that was just the time to make them. Here are my resolutions and how I fared.

Blog...taxes

Originally posted July 8, 2009:

I’m making some new resolutions. Why not? Why make January 1 the only date where we impose formidable goals for ourselves? Besides, I’m tired of the January resolutions (that maybe didn’t work out so well.)

Actually, I sort of like the idea of a mid-year goal. Yes—I know. The year is more than half-way up. Even better, though! I’m making a resolution to do things that I’ve actually already started.

I think I’m going to impose time-limits and reviews on my resolutions. See how they’re working out for me or if they need to be tweaked in a few months.

Now, without further ado, my resolutions:

Do a better job with my record-keeping for my taxes. (Pictured—me giddily thinking how nice it will be to write stuff off on my taxes next spring.) My inspiration for this resolution was a recent post on Diane Wolfe’s blog. I’m going to use the stuff-everything-into-an-envelope method. But at least that means that I’ll have the receipts next year. I was really kicking myself this past March when I did my taxes—I could have written off many things if I’d just kept the darned receipts.

Update: I’ve got a big paper bag stuffed with receipts for everything from pencils, paper, and printer ink to hotel and gas receipts for my trip to Memphis. I give myself an A+ on this resolution. Tax season? Bring it on.

Keep more on top of social media, marketing, and publishing trends. I have this really foreboding feeling that everything is about to turn topsy-turvy and if I don’t pay attention, I might go the way of the dinosaurs. If we’re all heading to e-books I should just keep my mouth shut and try to adjust. Que sera sera. And I need to find out exactly what the heck Flickr is (and why the application leaves out the ‘e’ from its name. Which really irritates me.)

Update: I’ve kept on top of social media, but I still don’t understand Flickr and its odd and annoying spelling. I give myself a B+ on this one.

Read more. I miss the time I used to spend reading. Nowadays I’ve just got to schedule it in instead of acting like it will just spontaneously happen. But I think you’ve got to keep reading to be a good writer. Besides, there are so many books on my to-read list right now. And spending time at my local bookstore (and having the staff know who I am) has got to be a good thing.

Update: I have read more. It was in spurts and I didn’t make a dedicated time for it, but I fit it in daily. I’ll grade myself as an A- for this resolution.

Balance my writing schedule better. So I’ve got to write, revise, and market all at the same time. I just need to get over it, stop complaining, and thank my lucky stars I’m in this situation. Figure out how to keep from shortchanging one book for the sake of the other.

Update: I’ve still got room to grow for time management. The days I followed my plan, it worked out really well. The problem was when I got off-course and ended up taking time away from my family. My goal remains to finish writing tasks before 2:00 each afternoon. Grade: B.

Just say no. Because I can’t. And my time is getting completely eaten up by stuff I shouldn’t be doing.

Update: Bleh. Grade: C. Or maybe a D. :) I tried to divest myself of one big responsibility but then was talked back into doing it! I’m a pushover. But I’m working on it.

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Sooo….it went pretty well, overall. I think I’ll keep these same resolutions and check back in with my progress later. I think I do better to have resolutions that get updated and graded every 5 or 6 months. :)

14 Reasons Why Libraries are Writers’ Best Friends

Henry Lamb, The Artist's Wife 1933 You don’t have to spend a lot of money to become a better writer. That’s a good thing because most writers don’t have a ton of money to throw around.

The library has all the resources a writer needs. It’s always been one of my favorite places on Earth. Here are the reasons why libraries are writers’ best friends:

Research

*Researching your book: Libraries have computers with internet capabilities. They have books and periodicals on a multitude of different subjects. They also have research librarians/information specialists who can help you with research and find reference materials to help you in your search.

*Researching your genre: You can easily check out a dozen recently-published books in your genre. It’s a quick way to see what publishers are looking for.

*Need help with grammar and writing style? The library will have reference books to help you. My favorite style book is Elements of Style by Strunk and White. It’s been around for ages.

*Books on the writing craft? Different libraries have different books, but there are some that will be in nearly every branch: like On Writing by Stephen King, Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott, and On Writing Well by William Zinsser.

*Some libraries will have subscriptions to helpful periodicals like Writer’s Digest.

A Place to Write

*Has your house gotten crazy? Kids/spouse driving you nuts? Is a coffeehouse too expensive? The public library is a great place to write.

Help With the Submission Process

*Looking for an agent? Look at the acknowledgements page in one of the recent releases in your genre. Agents are nearly always thanked.

*Another great way to find agent and editor names is by using Writer’s Market and Literary Market Place. Using these books at the library means saving lots of money—these books are expensive.

*Need help quickly summing up your book in a query letter? Look at back cover copy of novels in your genre.

*Don’t have email and you need to email some queries? You can set up a Gmail or Hotmail account that can be accessed from a computer at your local library.

Promotion

*Libraries are major book purchasers. Find out which libraries have your book. Go to WorldCat.org, which searches libraries for content worldwide. You just plug in your book’s name, hit the search button, and find the results. For a listing of public libraries, go to Public Libraries.com. You’ll get physical addresses, phone numbers, and websites (from which you can get the library’s email address).Send the acquisitions librarian an email or postcard with your cover photo, ISBN number, title of the book, publisher’s name, your name, release date, short summary, and any good review snippets.

*The librarians at my local branch are my friends, too. They’ve been incredibly supportive—my book is nearly always checked out of the library or on request because of their generous recommendations of my book to patrons. They’ve also put my book on a display with other regional authors.

*If you’re looking for a place to give a writing workshop or talk, your library usually has a meeting room that’s perfect for your event. Many of them will allow you to sell your book as well (it’s nice to give a donation to their Friends of the Library program if your signing is for-profit.)

*Libraries also provide locations for writing groups and book clubs to gather. For some writers, meeting with other writers and readers is a great way to network and find support and encouragement.

There are many expensive paths a writer can take toward professional development. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Writing shouldn’t have to cost more than the pen and paper you’re writing on.

Happy New Year, everyone! I hope 2010 is a happy and successful year for all of you! And…if you’re throwing a party tonight, I have a party idea for you on the Mystery Lovers’ Kitchen.

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