by Elizabeth S. Craig, @elizabethscraig
Lately, I’ve had ideas bursting out of me at crazy times of the day: frequently when I’m doing something else.
I’m driving a car and am struck by three or four ideas or bits of dialogue or plot points or character names. I was honked at yesterday while dreaming at a stoplight (particularly irksome for me because I’m usually the honk-er and not the honk-ee).
I’m having a conversation with someone and get ideas.
I’m falling asleep (this is happening on a daily basis now) and getting ideas.
These ideas are for current projects, future projects, and a nonfiction project I don’t have time for but am doing anyway.
My creative thoughts are just leaping out at me during any halfway quiet moment because I’m so busy they don’t have the opportunity to naturally develop during brainstorming sessions.
The funny thing (here in the States, anyway) is that free time, where you’re just doing nothing, isn’t particularly valued.
My son, for instance, was involved in way too many activities last year. He was gone most of the time—day in and day out, on weekends, and in the evenings. He was drained, so I pulled him out of one of the main time-stealing culprits—marching band.
I ran into one of the other marching band parents and she asked me about it. I said that he was too busy and was too rarely at home.
“Well, what’s he going to do with that free time?” she asked.
I just blinked at her. Of course I was the wrong person to ask this question of. “Whatever he wants to,” I said. “Stare off into space if he wants to. It’s free time.”
“He’ll be bored,” she said.
“That might be a good thing.”
I can’t remember the last time I was bored. I’m frequently restless, but never bored. Being bored always led to creative pursuits for me, though.
This importance placed on structured activities is apparently not only a modern phenomenon. Here’s a bit of dialogue where Christopher Robin explains to Pooh that he won’t be around as much anymore (he’s being sent off to boarding school):
I’m not going to do nothing anymore.”
“Never again?”
“Well, not so much. They don’t let you.”
The House at Pooh Corner. A.A. Milne. 1928.
There does seem to be a conspiracy against nothingness.
I was glad to see that the other parent plans to pull her child out of band at the end of this year. Nothing against band—I take any opportunity to support arts for children—but because her son was equally run ragged.
When was the last time you penciled in some nothingness into your schedule?
Elizabeth – A very good reminder, for which thanks :-). It really is important to take some time to do…nothing once in a while. Our minds need the rest. And as you say, that’s when we can get our creative juices flowing again. Wonder what it is about our culture that so often leads us to think it’s wrong to do nothing…
That quote from Milne always makes me tear up. Back when I was a kid, we were allowed to PLAY. Nowadays it seems that parents are expected to fill every waking moment of their kids’ lives with Something Important.
Although I was the mom of a band geek, I commend you for cutting back.
Terry
Terry’s Place
I pencil nothingness into my schedule almost every day, but I’m retired, no children to run around and raise. I find that if I don’t get still and quiet, I get sick, because the creativity and wisdom can’t move through.
Karen
Hi Elizabeth – can quite see where you’re at … I was that way when my mother was still alive – and it’s a relief now that I can relax and let my thoughts wander at times. By Christmas I’ll have sorted things here – then I’ll have time to deal with those ideas et al … bliss … and time to “just think” and “mull”
Nothingness – I value that now!! Cheers – you have so much going on .. I’m not surprised you don’t have much time “to sit and stare …” – Hilary
Thing is, sometimes I feel like I do nothing too often. Whatever doing nothing hurts my writing or my daily life in general varies.
We all need to be bored regularly, kids especially, because as you so succinctly stated, it fuels creativity!
How exciting that you filled with ideas that can’t wait to get out!
I agree with you on kids having too much going on, and applaud you for pulling your son out. When my kids were young, they would play soccer or a seasonal sport, but some of my friends kids were run ragged daily from the time school let out (and school is their work). I wanted my kids to be able to play, read, relax, etc. All of that is very important stuff.
It is funny that your wrote about this today, because I have been thinking about it, but in another way. My MIL is in a nursing home two towns away, and I visit every other day. On my off days, I come home and take time to think about what I heard and what I learned and what I think can be done better or needs more attention. I think that if I was there everyday, one thing would blend into another. My down time helps me process things to make her stay there better.
Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Kathy M.
Good for you! Kids are too busy these days. God forbid he grow bored and read or something.
I can’t remember the last time I was bored.
I couldn’t imagine trying to keep up with the schedules some kids have today. For a lot of reasons – large family and small budget – our kids could participate in one activity that ate up a lot of time that was not school time or family time. Still, with five kids, the schedules kept us hopping.
I don’t spend much time doing nothing, but I do take breaks to go for a walk or just spend some time outdoors. That always seems to refresh me when I have a busy schedule.
I’m a guy – we excel at doing nothing on a regular basis!
Preach it!
Kids are too busy these days, and the whole *competition* thing is part of the problem. “How is your son going to get into college if he isn’t sleep deprived?” “The Chinese don’t take naps!” “The United States only ranks 3rd in the world for stress-induced heart problems. We can do better!”
Okay, those are exaggerations but yes, down time is important. I wish I had some. Then again, on the blue moons that I do, I look around confused and think, “What *should* I be doing right now?”
I have to pencil in sleep, time to walk, and time to do nothing. Otherwise, I’ll go full speed all day and go mad in the process.
Margot–We’re fairly competitive here? :) I don’t know…think it might have been this way since the very start of our country. But I think slowing down is such a good idea. And maybe some vacations–even staying-at-home vacations.
Hilary–Wandering thoughts…sounds wonderful! Enjoy. :)
Chihuahua Zero–There needs to be a balance, right? So maybe you need to get out *more* to get characters and ideas. I get like that sometimes.
Terry–It’s hard to cut back–and I did get a little flak over it. But things are so much better now.
Karen–Well put! That is a real danger of going and going without a break. Love what you said about the creativity and wisdom coming through.
Karen–I’m going to try to find time to get bored in 2013. Sounds like a good goal to me.
Kathy–There are so many structured activities now. It’s not that the activities themselves are bad (we’ve got piano and horseback and church and scouts), it’s just the sheer number of them. Too much stuff going on.
Oh, Kathy…that’s a long drive and a lot of it. You’re good to do that.
I love the way you put it–that it helps us to process the world around us. It really does, I think.
Diane–And he loves to read. He squeezes in the time by reading on his phone when he can. That’s a little sad, too!
Alex–You keep that up, Alex! :)
J. D.–Exactly. It just gets too much. I remember many days of just staring at the wall as a kid…doesn’t seem to happen these days much.
Yes, I’m just like that. I do feel guilty for slowing down or stopping…but then, when I’ve got all these ideas trying to pop out, it acts as a wake-up call.
Stephen–I know what you mean.
Maryann–Mother of 5…you’re a hero!
Taking a walk is a great idea. I don’t take enough walks. Nice way to get my exercise and get some time to daydream, too.
We don’t overbook our kids for just that reason! And in our home, we love our “lazy days,” as we call them. We’re busy, but not so busy that we can’t waste an afternoon doing nothing :)
Julie–I’d love a lazy day just about now!
Great reminder to not drive ourselves crazy with activity. It seems like we are always running around, always on a mission, always busy. Good for you for taking your son out of one of his activities to have some time back!
Thank your for being bold enough to say that a daily dose of free time is healthy. I feel so frustrated if I don’t have time for whatever I feel like, spontaneous and unplanned. :)