Memory and Writers?

The Persistence of Memory--Dali I’d just like to check and see if anyone else is in the same shape I am, memory-wise. It seems that my head is so full of imaginary friends (and I do mean my characters…I gave up on Super Elizabeth a long time ago) that I’ve become very, very forgetful.

I forget things I’m supposed to attend. I forget where I’ve put something. I forget why I went upstairs. I forget why I went to the store.

And very frequently, I’m forgetting people. This is very bad because these people never forget me and spend their lives tormenting me in the drugstore, grocery store, post office, and library: “Elizabeth! How are you? And how is your husband? And your two children? Gosh, your son must be going into 7th grade now? Wow! Please tell your family I said hi.” And I am smiling and stuttering and wondering who the hell these people are.

My good friends know that I will never introduce them to anyone because I won’t remember who the person is who acts like they know me.

Lately I’ve tried to do a pre-emptive strike: if a person looks even vaguely familiar, I go up to talk to them. If I act like I know them first, then they won’t realize I don’t remember them at all.

This led to a very embarrassing situation for me at the Harris Teeter grocery store the other day. There was a middle-aged man in the frozen foods that I thought looked familiar. “Hi there!” I said brightly and started a conversation with him. He looked surprised, but pleased. I ended up with, “Well, I hope I’ll see you at Boy Scouts soon.” “Oh,” he said with crinkled brow, “I don’t have a son.”

Dear God. So my poor memory led to me chatting up strange men at the grocery store.

Anyhow, the point of this story is to find out if anyone else is in the same mess? Oh—and also, do people talk to you when you’re in your own, creative little world and they have t0 say “Ma’am? Ma’am? Ma’am?” a few times before you snap-to?

Or do I need to make an appointment with my GP?

Elizabeth Spann Craig

View posts by Elizabeth Spann Craig
Elizabeth writes the Memphis Barbeque series (as Riley Adams) and the Southern Quilting mysteries for Penguin and writes the Myrtle Clover series for Midnight Ink and independently. She also has a blog, which was named by Writer’s Digest as one of the 101 Best Websites for Writers. There she posts on the writing craft, finding inspiration in everyday life, and fitting writing into a busy schedule.

7 Comments

  1. Cassandra JadeJune 20, 2009

    My own creative space is hard to penetrate. I have always slipped into the zone when reading (though only when reading something good, and my parents used to try all manner of things to get my attention – my husband simply takes the book off of me). Now I am in the same zone a lot when thinking of stories or writing, and very little short of an explosion will get my attention.

    As to memory, I have never once in my life remembered the date of anybody’s birthday. Dates and numbers slip through my head like grains of sand between my toes while at the beach.

    The funny thing is, that most people think I have an exceptional memory. Mostly because I am very organised and know I can’t remember dates and so am very particular about checking on things. Also I am good with small details and trivia, so once I attach something useful (such as the face and name together) the other details tend to fall into place.

    That said, I could tell you more about most of my characters then most people I talk to in real life.

  2. Alan OrloffJune 20, 2009

    “…do people talk to you when you’re in your own, creative little world and they have t0 say “Ma’am? Ma’am? Ma’am?” a few times before you snap-to?”

    Yes, and it really annoys me :)

  3. Watery TartJune 20, 2009

    Ar you channeling me? I swear you are pulling things out that exactly apply. I used to have a memory… a good one. I had been attributing my memory loss to my second pregnancy, but you know… the kid is 10 now. Shouldn’t it have come back?

    And now that you mention it, it is significantly worse since I started writing seriously about 4 1/2 years ago. My husband has blamed my computer time. It’s a darned good thing he is the primary parent, because otherwise our children would miss appointments and go unfed more often than not.

    So I feel better to know I’m not alone!

  4. alexisgrantJune 20, 2009

    I can relate! I just moved back to my hometown after living away for 10 years, and since apparently I look the same as I did in high school, everyone and their mother (literally) recognizes me, while I struggle to remember faces and names. Makes for some embarassing situations!

  5. ColemanJune 20, 2009

    This comment has been removed by the author.

  6. Elizabeth Spann CraigJune 20, 2009

    Cassandra, that’s funny you would mention other people’s perceptions of you. I write EVERYTHING down, so sometimes people who don’t know me well do think I have a good memory.

    Too funny Alan! Okay, you’d be getting the ‘Sir? Sir?’ But I don’t think you do, because you’re way too orgainized-sounding (anyone who makes time to run every day has probably got all his faculties.)

    Watery, you and I must be experiencing ESP somehow. Writing is definitely the cause of our memory loss, I think. But I do try to blame everything on my pregnancies (my 2 cavities, my weak knee…). Maybe memory loss comes with the territory, too.

    Elizabeth

  7. Galen Kindley--AuthorJune 20, 2009

    Well, I have the exact same problem. However I can’t attribute the cause to a writing-related issue—much as I’d like to. I’m afraid, at age of 60… Gulp, did I just say…60? Phew. Well, in my case it’s just plain old…well…old! Sigh.
    Now, I do have characters in my head, and some of them come trotting out to hold conversations. Particularly if a point of emphasis is need from the perspective of: a bad guy, a put-upon victim, an idiot…this one comes out a bit too frequently, I’m afraid, and so forth. These people are endlessly entertaining for my wife.
    But, you know what’s kinda scary? Until she pointed out the number of people who live in my head and appear unbidden, I was unaware I did this kinda thing. SO, there you have it, old AND nuts.

    Best Regards, Galen
    GalenKindley.com

Comments are closed.

Scroll to top