Writing an argument occasionally becomes necessary.
I’ve got suspects who argue with police and suspects who argue with each other.
The funny thing about writing arguments is that they’re not at all like real life confrontations.
I don’t like arguing—I’m one of those ‘stony silence’ people. Or sometimes a ‘I’m going along with the group, but really unhappy about it’ person.
But lately, I’m having a few arguments with my rising 7th grader. I suppose this is because he’s entering his teen years. The arguments go something like this (this argument we had yesterday morning while visiting my parents and my parents’ church): Me: “Hey, you can’t wear shorts to Nana and Papa’s church.” My son: “Why not?” Me: “Because then your church shoes will look silly if you’re wearing shorts.” My son: “But I’m not going to wear my church shoes. I’m going to wear my tennis shoes.” Me: “Your tennis shoes look awful! They’re covered in mud!” My son (affronted): “They look just fine. There’s not a spot on them.” Me: “No, no! You’ve got to wear khaki pants and your dressy shoes!” Him: “MOM!!! It’s 90 degrees outside!”
You get the idea. It was a stupid argument. And, actually, most arguments that I’ve observed or participated in, have been ridiculously stupid.
Ways Written Arguments are Different from their Real-Life Counterparts:
They shouldn’t have repetitive elements. Unlike the argument above, which went in circles for at least 10 minutes with both my son and myself reiterating past points about the cleanliness or filthiness of said shoes.
They shouldn’t be boring. Written arguments are there to forward the plot along. They should reveal something about a relationship between two people, give the reader information about a problem, or perhaps even (in the case of mysteries) set up a murder. At any rate, they can’t be about shoes.
They shouldn’t be formulaic. This sort of goes along with the above point. We all know how husbands and wives are supposed to argue: “I think that you’re feeling________, which I understand (validating his/her feelings). But when you do ________, it makes me feel _________.” Well, that’s all well and good for real-life arguments. In fact, it’s an excellent way to argue. It’s just incredibly boring to read. When I’m reading, I expect some fireworks during an argument.
There should be some sort of immediate outcome from the argument. I’m reading a PD James novel now (The Private Patient) and there’s a scene involving an argument between the surgeon and a nurse. The two were having a relationship, which came to an end during the argument. This fight stays in the back of the reader’s mind whenever Ms. James brings the two into a new scene. We realize they feel awkward around each other, we see the way they’re avoiding the other. Arguments could result in breakups, violence, regrets, and escalated tension. They could be used as a device to send the plot in a completely different direction.
Arguments are a great way to provide conflict and tension to a manuscript. I just make sure mine aren’t as unfocused and pointless in print as the verbal variety I’ve engaged in lately.
Something to think about as I write today. Thanks, Elizabeth! You do a great job here of relating real life to writing.
One of the things I love about reading fiction is that people say and do things that we don’t see and hear in real life. This is a great post, Elizabeth.
Karen Walker
Good points. And I’d hate to read a book that reported, word for word, some of the arguments I had with my kids when they were teens. Can only be compared to an infinite loop. The fictional version can usually be cut to two lines (one Mom said and one Kid said).
Hi Elizabeth! Just popping over from my blog, Brain Throw Up. What an excellent post! And so true about writing arguments…which are one of my most favorite things to writer. Since I usually write romance, my arguments are filled with sexual tension – very fun to write!
I never thought about arguments in quite this way, but–as usual–your points are exactly on-target and well made. My take away was, “There should be some sort of immediate outcome from the argument.” For me, that’s key, otherwise, why include it? Nicely done.
Oh, as a fellow male, I understand your son’s position clearly. Seems like, about a thousand years ago, I said something similar. Why, again, was he wrong??? (Grin)
Best regards, Galen
Imagineering Fiction Blog
You have a point, Elizabeth. Many arguments are about silly things, at least on the surface. What I think is interesting are those arguments that seem silly on their face, but are driven by some underlying event, often unrelated to the “topic” of the argument.
These are cool to read, and to write.
If book arguments and, for that matter, book conversations were true mirrors of real life, books would be sooo boring. Writing them as they would sound in real life is a mistake a lot of beginning writers make. Thanks for this post. It’s excellent advice.
Helen
Straight From Hel
Great post, Elizabeth. That is such a true point – why can’t we argue in person the way they do in books? At least then something productive comes of it, lol.
Nancy, from Realms of Thought…
Ah Elizabeth, thanks, I am about to write an argument,between a father and son.You made me think about the angle to approach it.
Katie–Thanks for visiting! I love your blog.
Galen–Yeah, I think I had the same argument w/my mom when I was a kid. I did win, though. :)
Alexis–Thanks!
Helen–Good point…writing dialogue is the same way.
Karen–You’re right, it’s nice to have an escape from reality.
Nancy–Hmm…maybe I’ll have to take my writing advice and apply it to real life!
Glynis–Thanks for popping by and good luck with your scene.
Great tips and interesting post. I haven’t really thought about this idea before, but it’s so true, fictional arguments are nothing like real life – maybe that’s why they’re fun to write.
JaneKennedySutton
Hi elizabeth,
Re-emerging to drop a line and say thanks for a great post. Arguments are interesting reading, and you’re spot on with the construction. Nice job.
Jane—True…if they WERE similar to real-life, they’d be stressful to write instead of fun.
Patricia–Yes, there definitely is an infitite loop aspect to the arguments we’re having. I guess the way to stop this current one is to put his gross shoes in the washer.
Karen–Thanks for dropping by! I enjoyed your post this a.m. on spinach.
Alan–This is a very interesting point. Usually real-life arguments AREN’T about the subject being argued about. So…my argument with my son was more like ‘who’s in control, here?’. This would really add a level of depth to the scene as we write.
Interesting subject, and I think you’ve thought it through well and made some very good points.
The Old Silly
CONFLUENCE is about a family (from 4 perspectives), one a teen, so there are inevitably several arguments, but I think your point is excellent that if they go completely as real dialog goes, it feels tedious to read. I frequently give a ‘sampler’ of the dialog and then a summary of the middle of the argument and then a conclusion (at least where arguments between a parent and (in my case) teen and 5-year-old go), because the realism is important, but the reality too much–if that makes sense.
In editing I also find myself striking out a lot of the jarring language (words or parts of words repeated, as in reality we do when we get flustered).
Just think about how much more dramatic our lives would be if we argued like our characters did :-)
Livia–There’d be fireworks galore! Thanks for stopping by.
Elizabeth